Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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