They should really pass out barf bags in church
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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