oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
