he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
