yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
