marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
