I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
