i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
