just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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