I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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