The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
