HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize
