He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
