yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
