If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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