I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
