Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Who did Billy Mays play for?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Randomize