I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
operation have a gay friend backfired
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
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Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
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He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize