It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
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