Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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