so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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