just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
