ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
