Can i not drive my cunt home
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
