new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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