i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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