so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
