Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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