I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
