Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
