"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
