I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
