She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
