I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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