You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
