He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize