SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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