I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
