i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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