Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
