Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee