How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.