Texts From Last Night

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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.

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  (201): You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn. http://tfl.nu/vn8h
  Replies (12) Good night (3454) Bad night (1019)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.

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  (407): It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it. http://tfl.nu/o8fq
  Replies (27) Good night (999) Bad night (7043)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...

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  (717): and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived... http://tfl.nu/vut2
  Replies (11) Good night (2203) Bad night (3805)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."

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  (318): He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later." http://tfl.nu/4lz3
  Replies (14) Good night (2436) Bad night (3755)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.

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  (210): hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober. http://tfl.nu/bh32
  Replies (11) Good night (3310) Bad night (983)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.

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  (410): Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe. http://tfl.nu/rdse
  Replies (5) Good night (984) Bad night (2499)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too

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  (402): He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too http://tfl.nu/2c7f
  Replies (9) Good night (4381) Bad night (1073)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!

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  (803): There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED! http://tfl.nu/9ss0
  Replies (5) Good night (1645) Bad night (1103)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like

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  (617): My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like http://tfl.nu/dpsj
  Replies (4) Good night (689) Bad night (1820)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"

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  (207): So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night" http://tfl.nu/8ia2
  Replies (5) Good night (1455) Bad night (437)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  You're the worst gay friend ever.

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  (314): No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like? (1-314): You're the worst gay friend ever. http://tfl.nu/4trc
  Replies (2) Good night (1686) Bad night (691)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  "Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.

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  (512): "Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me. http://tfl.nu/6uta
  Replies (1) Good night (756) Bad night (354)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.

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  (618): Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose. http://tfl.nu/98w1
  Replies (2) Good night (969) Bad night (350)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.

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  (412): his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on. http://tfl.nu/3l4h
  Replies (3) Good night (453) Bad night (743)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  So there's that.

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  (724): Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself (724): So there's that. http://tfl.nu/rzby
  Replies (0) Good night (425) Bad night (282)

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