I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
