No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Randomize
