I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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