is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
