So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
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You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
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I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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