Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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