Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize