her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
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