You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
