Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
