I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
